The story had a good story line to it and a good idea for the topic, but I wanted it to be longer so it would be more interesting. I think the the short story (the phone goes dead) is aimed at teenagers because the topic is about when David had his first phone and people in year 7&8 normally buy their first phone. I would give the story 5 stars because the story was interesting.
By Sabir Ahmed Year 8
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